Right in the Middle

 


As a first born daughter and grand-daughter from parents who got married so young, I have multiple roles in the family other than that two. I am a sister for my siblings and cousins, and also a 'friend' for my aunts, because they trust me with their family and kids stories as if I am an outsider.

Today, I am visiting my aunt and we had a little talk about a school which is one of the best Islamic school in Indonesia. But the reality is their teaching does not fully reflect Islamic teaching, and the social life among the students. So she should be toughen up, to go against her youngest daughter's tantrum comparing herself and her friends.

"Of course the mother is the madrasah.. but the father is the headmaster!" my aunt conclude her story about dividing role between her and my uncle. We laugh. She was right. Kids education supposed to be on both responsibilities because if not, the mother will always be the bad cop and kids will hate her for that. Her image to the kids would only be anger and discipline, and they won't be able to open up emotionally to her. 

Between work schedule and responsibility at work, maintaining balance in educating children, be the father, and a good husband, is sure not an easy job. I don't have any comment on this because nobody is perfect, except The Prophet and the closest thing we can get to his beautiful character is constantly trying and willing to learn. 

Maintaining balance means staying right in the middle. But, how do we get to the middle?


***

Allah has created the middle as the most beautiful part on everything. The Sun is the source of energy for the entire galaxy, located at the center of the universe. The diamond stone in the ring, located right at the center of the circle. Even the most sacred part on human body is sure located right in the middle. 

Human beings, on the other hand, is struggling to balance everything. I, for one, got migraine if the temperature is too hot, or too cold. Too much physical activity, and too little physical activity. Too much sugar, and too little sugar. Too much coffee... well, how much is too much for coffee? (lol)

So tell me, how do we get to the middle?

I have shifted my perspective from A to N just in a few month, and an umrah. I understood nothing, to now I understand more things. But still.. I am not able to internalise what I know to my action. The brain and the heart seem to be operating separately until now, and I wish to unite them well. I wish to be content in doing extra things other than the obligatory. I wish to feel light in performing my non obligatory ibadah.. and I still figure out, how. 

Only one thing I know; I should keep asking question. I asked my father when I was eight where did Allah come from and I didn't stop asking ever since although his answer used to be able to silence me. Answers always find a way to reveal itself, so yeah.. I will keep asking the questions in my heart. Allah knows, and Allah guides. 

***

Fun fact: today, 2 July 2025 is right in the middle between 2000 and 2050. There are 9131 days between 2 July 2000 to 2 July 2025, and also 9131 days between 2 July 2025 to 2 July 2050.

Starting tomorrow, we are officially closer to 2050 than to 2000, and I still have the book in my bookshelves "The World in 2050". I will re read it tomorrow.


*

2 July 2025,

Oh baby, why don't you just meet me in the middle? -song lyric which title I forgot-

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