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Second Thought.. or.. Second Opinion (?)

If someone thinks one could only love one person his/her whole life, they are wrong. Truth is, people can use love and affection like multiple choice. Only people with commitment will stay fully loyal and dedicated to one person, and that has nothing to do with love. 

***

Oh, maybe I'm not the right person to tell you about these all-love-things. Because I'm a failure my self (even if I still believe in true love of mine out there, maybe he just asleep or.. falling into the wrong arms by now. Never mind). Anyway., the reason I'm writing you all these is because I was just realised how naive I could be all these time.

Gossip Girl, the drama series about Manhattan elite, happen to open my eyes on how people keep making mistakes, hurting and betraying people they loved, but still get their apologies. Another mind-opening experience was with my best friend - including three a.m drive and have nothing in mind. He said that out loud, which made me confront him at the time, but thinking after the night. He was right. I am naive, and conservative. I want things in traditional way, like believing man should be the one who do all the chasing, (but I keep pushing away the men who get closer after all.. didn't realise that back then, tho).. but now I know.. I wasn't wrong by wanting love in that way, but I wasn't right either. 

It's true that love and marriage could be different. You can chose who you want to marry, but you can't chose who you fall in love with. It's like the heart play games all the time, and sending you mixed signal whenever you meet someone cute or fulfil your criteria. 

You can be marrying someone you didn't love, but you'll start to feel one, after time pass. Weird, is it?

Yeah.. that's the ugly truth you don't wanna hear or accept, especially if you're a newly wed now, and madly in love to each other. 

People can really love different person, with the same amount of love, but different way of loving. (It's harder to write than I thought). I warn you this, so if one day you caught up your husband cheating over you, don't be furious. Be mad at the very elegant ways possible. The more you burn your anger, the more he lose interest at you. 

Stick this in mind: it's natural for men wanting another women beside his wife. Men loves to do the chase, the hunting keeps them alive, and if it's torture,.. you know how lurking it is to finally caught the fish. 

Jealousy only a sign of insecurity.. A real woman won't got trap into jealousy too deep.. (but I know jealousy is a spice for love and relationship). You have to be powerful enough to let him know that you know, and that you mad, without your anger break the plates. How to do that? Simply by keeping in mind, that it's just natural, and will pass with time. 

Since jealousy is a spice, you'll only need a few of it, not too much, not too little. Just enough to keep the spark alive. 

***

I know nothing about love, for sure. And wise man once said, we learn how to love from the people who don't actually loved us. All I know is.. that even if a couple couldn't be together, doesn't mean that they won't love each other. They could use a different love, with the same amount of love they have for their spouse. It's not cheating. It's nature. It's human to craved for love and be loved. 

But whatever it is, if one is in relationship, stay committed is part of the responsibility. Irresponsible husband or wife is worse than a cheater. 

Maybe we need love so we won't spend the rest of our life alone,. or.. to have a second opinion for all the things we'll going thru. Maybe we had a second thought while living the life we thought we love, by having an affair with our partner from work, or a girl from the train. 

And if you ask me.. the one you love, would be stand by your side no matter what, to give you the second opinions you need. But careful, love.. second thought, is haunting you no matter where you go. 

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