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Choosing the Person who Spark Joy

When it comes to person.. I need to inhale a little deeper. I know.. Its the hardest part. Especially if you're choosing the one you'd like to marry. It takes thousand of consideration, blissful thinking (or paranoia.. Maybe), sleepless nights..

You might worry by the fact that you will end up with that person forever. And by forever means.. Everyday, hour and minutes you spend, will be with him/her.

This is scarry to some people who already find contentment in their singleton. Coupledom is terrifying and.. Weighing you down.

But you know you can't forever be alone. In the end, your parents are craving for grand child. Your friends are getting more distant because they have their own family to mind. So you decided to start over, to build a relationship you always afraid of. To be open to some people and let the chance face you for once or twice.

And then you're gettin more confused because the one you end up with is only spark joy for a couple months. The first beginning was magnificent and it became boring more and more each day. He/she just fulfilling your ego, but not your heart. She's good for your appetite but not fully feed. And you start to worry on how life will be if you spend it with him/her.

***

Its okay, tho. Don't worry because things like this, happened all the time. Everywhere, every corner.

I understand if you wanna get out from the circle. So my best advice is: first, step out!

End the relationship that doesn't spark joy to you. If he's/she's only fulfilling your ego, realise that you can't feed the ego forever. Or worst: sacrificing your life for EGO! Wow that's pathetic.

Maybe.. You look good when you walk down the road with him/her. Or you're instagram feed will be absolutely stunning with him/her beside you.

But darling, you can't live forever with that. Not everyday people's opinion make you happy. There will be time when your job haunt you down and you need shoulder to calm you, but you cant find it at home because you marry the ego.

Ego will only bring rush. Ego will give you the way to anxiety. Because you care too much on what people say. Put it over. Leave it behind. Start from: NOW.

***

Get over of one story may not easy, especially if you never have trying. And you still have to do one more tip: find joy. Try to look at people not from their face or appearance. Look how they vibe. And by "look" I mean.. Feel.

Human and earth and all particles in the universe are communicating with one un noticed language: frequency.

From the string theory I know that the universe can be divided into four dimension. And for the tiniest dimension ever exist, result one tiny string and it interacts with another string. If it match, they'll know because frequency wont lie.

Only if you close your eyes, you can feel the vibe.

Try to look at people around you. Your friends, your old friends, new friends, stranger sitting beside you in the coffee shop, everyone. Close your eyes so you can feel the vibes stronger than before.

And if you're focusing your heart on the goal: finding the one, universe will conspire to help you meet him/her. Why? Because universe always have ways for those who know what they want.

***

What about spark joy?
How to decide whether he/she sparks joy, if the beginning is always the most exciting?

***

Frequency doesn't lie. You may feel the clique but still has a doubt in mind.

But you can never trick your heart if that person make you really happy and calm. Its not the butterflies that sparks annoyingly inside your stomach. Its not the nervous heart beat whenever your eyes met. Its not the sensation of wondering on how he/she feel about you.

Its all about calmness and joy. You really enjoying being you beside him/her. You feel calm when he/she is around. And you never be afraid when you have to go for a long time, that he/she will cheat on you.

Its the peaceful trust you gain when you meet the one.

That should be the ultimate goal for a single person, never settle for less. Just because he/she want you, doesn't mean you can ignore the fact that he/she annoyed you a lot with his/her opinion about your personal life.

When two people are falling in love, they don't need to change each other. They'll learn on how to accept one another, and be better every day. Each individual, realise their own flaws. And they both know they accept the flaws.

***

Am not being naive by telling you all these things because I believe its exist in the world. If you are patient enough to wait, and calm enough to feel the vibe.

Don't be in rush, otherwise you'll be a blamer for what you chose.

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